Gratitude is the way!

Every morning when I awake, I look up at my ceiling and I give thanks. I then start to name off all the things in my life I am thankful for, my home, my children, my friends, my health, and the list just goes on. By the time that I touch the floor, my mood is elevated and I realize that my life is wonderful just as it is now. There is an old saying that if you go into a room full of people and you lay your problems down and compare then to the problems of others you will pick yours back and leave with them.

When you give thanks for the things that you have in your life right now, you open the way for God to give you more.I have even began to write down 5 things a night that I am thankful for that happen to me that day, so I go to sleep feeling thankful. Open your mouth, give praise and change your life!

Embracing My Fullness

It seems as if I always have a moment in yoga. I guess because I am in such a state of peace that I can clearly hear God speaking to me. I was looking around (which you are not suppose to do) and I saw people of all sizes around me into there practice, some of the moves are still a little hard for me but I will not give up, I am a solider. As I once again saw myself in mirror in kneeling warrior,I realized that I love every single curve of my body, my long beautiful legs, my size 12 feet, my arms, my big full breast,my hips everything. I am created in the image and likeness of a perfect God and my body is a temple no matter what size it is.....

Love yourself right now, not for what it will be but as it is now. As you love your body it will love you back.

Chow for now!

Love Affirmations

- By Jeff Staniforth

Love is that ethereal experience that makes us feel completely alive. Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is transcended, and life seems worthwhile. Love is the ultimate nourishment of the soul.

It is said that the entire array of human needs is rooted in our need for love. Our yearning for fame, fortune and material things all boil down to our need to be acknowledged, respected, admired - and above all, loved.

No truer words have been said than those that George Sand wrote: "There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved."

The good news is, you can develop the skill to live a full and joyful life, enhanced by love -- and experience all the profound manifestations that love brings. Employing positive, loving affirmations will help you develop that skill.

Following are some loving affirmations you can use to attract, embody, give, receive and reap the rewards of love. As I've mentioned in the previous issue of this newsletter, choose the affirmations that feel appropriate to you -- those that resonate with you, or strike an emotional chord.

It is important that the words feel comfortable to you and are in line with who you are. Feel free to create one for your specific need by substituting other words that have special meaning to you:

* I am a radiant being filled with light and love.
* I love and accept myself exactly as I am.
* I now express love to all those I meet.
* I am a radiating center of divine love.
* Divine love is working through me now.
* I bathe in the unconditional love of my Creator
* Love radiates from me at all times.
* I love myself completely.
* Love comes to me easily and effortlessly.
* I give and receive love easily and joyfully.
* Others love me easily and joyfully.
* I now feel loved and appreciated by my parents, my friends.
* I express love freely
* As I give love, I am instantly supplied with more.
* I radiate love to all persons and places and things.
* People are just waiting to love me, and I allow them.
* I breathe in universal love.
* I attract loving, beautiful people into my life.
* I always deserve love.
* I am attracting loving relationships into my life.
* I project love to everyone I meet.
* I love and approve of myself.


The last affirmation in the above list, "I love and approve of myself," is one that Louise Hay (healer, minister, and author of "Heal Your Body" and many other life-transforming books) recommends.

TIP: There is a little-known technique for taking the power of affirmations to the highest level -- so that manifesting your desires becomes *automatic* and easy.

It is by combining affirmations with 7 of the most powerful manifestation technologies - visualization, alpha sound technology, subliminal technology, sentence completion, assignment writing/goal setting and whole brain wave synchronization.

Sounds daunting - but you can easily do this by using a first-of- its-kind software program that seamlessly integrates affirmations with the 7 powerful technologies to create a full "everything you need to succeed" approach to producing the results you want at unprecedented speed. It's really easy - if you can turn on your computer, you can use Sculptor. Go here to take it for a test drive.

I am having a moment

Workout, meetings, phone calls, lunch, busy, busy , busy.Today I haven't really even had time to breathe however my 13 year itch has had time to creep in. How do you stop the memories of someone that you have loved as long as you can remember?

Sometimes there's pain, sometimes there's laughter, but I truly miss him. I have so many wonderful things in my life,good family, good friends, I own a wonderful business but my love life is in the pitts..... Can we not be successful and have love? Do we compromise ourselves because we get so busy that we over compensate? What is it, where is the balance?

Why do I always seem to drift back to the memories of someone that I allowed to hurt me so badly? Because it's comfortable? I pray for guidance Lord.


Chow for now....

Date Night Part 1

Every Saturday night I go out on a date with someone I have met at a function, or online because as you very well may know I am in search of my husband, my life partner. Well in doing this I have a few rules that I follow we must meet in a very public place, if there is no connection I don't waste their time or mine and if anything about SEX comes up on the first date I am done.

This Saturday was different... I had a date with James. James & I have been conversing for 2 weeks we met via Eharmony which I think is one of the more serious online dating web sites. We agreed to me at a nice sushi bar on the South Side, he was nice enough on the phone but as you may know blind dates are always a bit scary. James was there first and of course I was fashionable late. We both agreed to dress causal so I wore some nice fitting jeans and a hugging sleeveless back shirt & some 3 inch Nine West sandals( since he was suppose to be 6"5 I figured he could handle that)and I pulled my hair back because it was hot as heck and not style is good in this humidity! James was sitting at the bar, I knew who he was because he looked just like the pictures he posted, I walked over and he stood up and said" Hi Fran" I have to tell you that my mouth hit the floor, this man was every bit of 6"5, beautiful mocha skin, wonderful eyes and a beautiful smile( all the teeth where present... YEAH) and the night began...

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Fat Girl Vs Phat Girl

This has been on my mind for quite sometime and I had a chance to revisit it last night as I was looking at pictures with my nephew I said" Why didn't someone tell me how fat I was?" Not that I didn't know but I was in that state of denial that we all visit when we think that we are so hot, but we are a hot unhealthily mess. I couldn't walk up 10 stairs without stopping and don't mention running.

About 5 years ago, my blood pressure was through the roof, I was tired, sad and thought I was the bomb. Now know that I was still in the flyest clothes and at that time I needed that to make me feel better about me. But no one took the time to tell me that I was unhealthy and that I need to take better care of myself. But after spending sometime with God and in prayer I now acknowledge that my body is a temple. That even if I will never be a size 10 I can still be in good health. By no means am I alittle girl but I am now a fit girl, my blood pressure is normal,I have tons of energy and I exercise everyday.

So now when I get dressed and look at myself in the mirror I know am a Phat Girl.

Rejection or Blessings?

Sometimes in relationships we tend to blame ourselves, we think" What did I do wrong, why doesn't he want me?" We pray to God and we ask for that man because we feel he is the one and that if I just had him I would be complete, we even (I even)bring Gods word into it,"You said Lord that you would give me the desire of my heart,I know that you word is true so I am standing on them". Of course God's word is true so he gives you a glimpse of what life would be like with this man,he brings him back into your life and not much has changed with him, but you have changed. The person that you were the last time he walked out your life you are no longer.


If someone walks out your life let them go,God just may be preparing the way for your real blessing, the catch is that you have to have enough faith, enough self worth the realize that you deserve only the best. So what you may see as rejection just may be God's blessing.

Chow for Now

Nourish Your Body

Surprising Vitamin Sappers
Article By: Camille Noe Pagán


When it comes to nutrients, are you unknowingly shortchanging your system?

You take your daily multivitamin, load up on dairy and eat a variety of fresh fruits and vegetables, so you must be getting enough vitamins and minerals. Right? Not necessarily! The truth is, many people sap their systems of key nutrients without even realizing it.

"Poor lifestyle choices, certain medications and even some beverages can interfere with your body's ability to absorb vitamin C, calcium and other essential nutrients," says Cindy Moore, RD, director of nutrition therapy at the Cleveland Clinic Foundation in Ohio. "That can set you up for vitamin deficiencies and the conditions that often accompany them, such as fatigue, depression and osteoporosis."
Fortunately, if you know what to watch out for, you can lower your risk of health problems. Here are five vitamin sappers to be aware of:

Alcohol
One single glass of wine won't leave your body nutrient-starved, but repeated, excessive alcohol use can. Drinking in excess can lead to deficiency in B vitamins, specifically thiamine, due to malnutrition. "Protect yourself by eating a balanced diet, but don't up your intake of supplements containing these vitamins," advises Moore. "Instead, keep your drinking to a minimum, and no more than one alcoholic beverage a day for women and two for men."

Nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs such as aspirin and naproxen
These medications decrease your liver's ability to produce bile, making it difficult for your body to absorb vitamins A, D and E, says pharmacist Mark Mandel, R.Ph., co-owner of Mark Drugs in Roselle, Illinois. "If your doctor has prescribed these drugs, talk to her as well as your pharmacist about how to prevent a vitamin deficiency," suggests Mandel. "Each person's needs differ depending on their health history and current condition."

Cigarettes
"Studies show that smokers need four times as much vitamin C as nonsmokers do, because their bodies use it in excess to detoxify," says Moore. Lower your risk of skin conditions related to a lack of vitamin C, not to mention lung and other cancers, by kicking the habit.

Black tea
Several studies have found that drinking black tea with a meal can inhibit the absorption of iron from non-animal sources, like beans, spinach and tofu. The good news is researchers from King's College in the UK determined that people who don't have a preexisting risk of iron deficiency can safely drink it without lowering their iron levels beyond normal. If you do have an iron deficiency, the study authors advice drinking black tea between meals, at least one hour after eating. Calcium and phytates (found in whole grains) can also impair absorption, but vitamin C helps absorption.

Antibiotics
While these drugs can be good for curing certain infections, they can also destroy healthy bacteria in your stomach, says Mandel. "Again, it's important to talk to your physician about how to protect yourself. She may suggest probiotic supplements to encourage the growth of good bacteria."


And remember: To avoid future health problems and negative drug interactions, always inform your pharmacist and physician about every single vitamin and supplement you take before starting a new medication or changing your diet.

Next Steps

That's what you are! Phenomenal

PHENOMENAL WOMAN
by Maya Angelou



Pretty women wonder where my secret lies
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing of my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,
They say they still can't see.
I say
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
The palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.





from And Still I Rise by Maya Angelou
copyright © 1978 by Maya Angelou.

Mean Sleep

I have been in the house all day doing research, reading, thinking... I often wonder what it was in me that made me stay for 14 years of off and on commitment? Why would I give myself to someone who was not available, physically, emotionally, period? Today I think I know why because we hold on for the change the change that we think we can create, the change that we think we can create in another person and we clearly cannot, the need to have it our way. Man when you wake up from that mean sleep and finally realize that there is nothing that you can do to change another you can only change you, when you began to work on you, thing began to work for you.


It hurts coming back to life!

Beauty Comes in all Shapes

Plus-size models buck thin trend in V magazine

‘Big’ news as avant-garde fashion publication releases February ‘Size’ issue
Big is beautiful

Curves ahead
Who says thin dominates the fashion industry? The “Size Issue” of V magazine features stunning plus-size models — like Crystal Renn — in sexy boysuits and barely-there outfits. Plus-size models buck thin trend in V magazine .. .More to love

The "Size Issue" intends to showcase high-fashion outfits on voluptuous bodies — a combination rarely found in women's magazines.

The models in V magazine appear in everything from bustiers and bodysuits to nothing but their own skin. A brand-new day dawns for full-size fashions .. .Thigh-high
After shooting the models for V, photographer Solve Sundsbo said, "I loved the opportunity to show that you can be beautiful and sexy outside the narrow interpretations that normally define us."

Model Tara Lynn wears a tight top by Armani Jeans. Fellow plus-size model Crystal Renn, whose dimensions are 36-31-41, also participated in the spread. "I'd like to see everyone take on the attitude that there are women of all different shapes and sizes as 'the beauty ideal,' and that it's not one type or another," Renn said. "There are women who are naturally a size 2 — you can't forget them, and that's discrimination the other way."


Model Michelle Olson wears a corset and briefs by Dolce & Gabbana. V magazine hopes their photo spread will prove big is bigger than ever: "These bombshells of plus-size are proving that there's plenty of room in the fashion world for women who look like ... women." German mag swaps thin models for real women .

V magazine creative director Stephen Gan says he was inspired by actress Gabourey Sidibe — who weighs nearly 250 pounds — after seeing her in the "Precious" trailer. The magazine features Sidibe and size zero actress Dakota Fanning on its two contrasting covers.
TODAYshow.com contributor

The stick-skinny, celery-and-cigarettes crowd of female models will likely never go out of fashion — but now their more substantial sisterhood is giving them a run for their money.

Glamour magazine fired the first shot last year when it featured a photo of plus-size model Lizzie Miller flashing a broad smile while letting her belly show. Now V magazine has upped the ante with the release of its “Size” issue this week — featuring models whose dress sizes hit double digits sporting skimpy bathing suits, hip-hugging jeans and, in some cases, nothing at all.

“I loved the opportunity to show that you can be beautiful and sexy outside the narrow interpretations that normally define us,” said photographer Solve Sundsbo, who snapped the models for V.

Big and small
V magazine is known for pushing the envelope on fashion journalism; it famously pictured pop star Lady Gaga topless in a photo spread last year. And now it has moved the debate of size-equals-beauty even more to the forefront with two competing covers of its new issue. One cover features 250-pound “Precious” film star Gabourey Sidibe, while the other cover features 100-pound, size-0 actress Dakota Fanning.

In addition, the current issue features a pictorial of traditionally svelte model Jacquelyn Jablonski posing in exactly the same fashions as plus-size model Crystal Renn.

Renn, of course, has become an icon to bigger women everywhere. The curvy size-12 model recounted her tale of trying to fit in with the size-0 modeling crowd in her memoir “Hungry,” released last year.

And while V seemingly sets up big-versus-small as some kind of competition, Renn has said she’s not out to topple the thin models from their traditional throne of dominance in the fashion industry.

“I’d like to see everyone take on the attitude that there are women of all different shapes and sizes as ‘the beauty ideal,’ and that it’s not one type or another,” Renn told The Associated Press.

“There are women who are naturally a size 2 — you can’t forget them, and that’s discrimination the other way,” Renn added. “All women bring something different to the table, and we have to appreciate them all.”

Eye of the beholder?
Still, V’s creative director Stephen Gan says he’s more in tune than ever to what bigger models can offer. He admits he was caught up in the smaller-is-better thinking until he met with Renn during New York City’s Fashion Week last fall.

“When someone as gorgeous as she is was talking about how her agent would keep telling her to lose weight … and she ended up nearly dying,” Gan was moved to re-examine his own mind-set, he told the New York Post.

The alternate cover of V features 250-pound “Precious” film star Gabourey Sidibe, who has made the magazine’s creative director, Stephen Gan, re-examine his ideas about beauty.But what sealed the deal for Ren was seeing the movie trailer for “Precious” last year and its zaftig star Sidibe. “I don’t want to sound like a fashion person … but for the last three months I have been obsessed with bigger girls!” he told the Post.

The average U.S. woman is considered to be a size 14, and some 41 percent of them are a larger size. While some critics have panned V’s plus-size model shoot, claiming it is in bad taste and promotes unhealthy living, Gan says he is of a mind to say, “Can’t we all just get along?”

“In this world, when a girl’s called ‘beautiful,’ sometimes my reaction to that is: In what terms? In fashion terms? Beauty pageant terms? Real people terms? I wish I could just say, ‘She’s beautiful,’ and leave it at that,” Gan told the Post.
© 2010 MSNBC Interactive. Reprints

Wonderful You

I was in yoga class this morning and I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Now by no means am I vain but I am thankful for who I am and how God created me. I am 5"11,( will never tell my weight lol) but I have long nice legs, a great bust line and OK you get the picture, but as I was honoring my Big Beautiful Body I realize something that it matters not what size you are, it is about loving who you are. Take care of yourself no matter what size you are, you owe yourself that. For God made you and you are wonderfully made.

Chow for now!

And the answer is?

I am interviewing men for my book and yes it will be one! the most common answer that I get from a man when I ask, "What do you look for in a woman?" " A woman who knows who she is without a man, a woman who is willing to stand up for or by herself, one who is not defined by a man." Good Stuff!

Am I to old FASHION?

This has been a very interesting weekend, I went out with a friend of mine who is also on her quest for love, I must say that the way a 28 year old dates is wayyyy different then mine. I seen her kiss people she just met, get felted up and even give a guy a ride home! I heard a man tell her that he is to busy to date because his business is just taking off, but he would love to go home with her tonight and she did it! I am thinking WTF!!! What happen to self respect and self worth? When a man tells you something about himself believe it and don't think that you can change them. Today she is at home with a massive headache & a heartache, it is not worth it. To get the kind of love that you want you need to love you first, don't settle and sometimes that means you just have to wait. I thank God daily for my perfect partner and I know he is coming. But what I want do is compromise who I am for one night of something that is forgettable the second it is over.

I am worthy of a real true, hot, passionate, respectable, giving, caring love & I want it!

Chow for now!

Happy Independence !

It is Friday and I am dateless... I am wondering if I am dateless by choice? I have been doing eHarmony with no luck, do you think that the commercials are fake? :) I am feeling a bit down because I am at a place where I want someone to spend time with but I am not willing to settle anymore, that is what got me in trouble in the first place, so now I must be P (patience) I don't like the word, so when you see that P that is what it means. I am going to do something different this weekend. I am going to go out, answer some of the emails on eHarmony and see what happens. God in heaven knows my desires, I just need to make sure they are the right ones:)

P.S. I didn't call or text him on his birthday, I am proud of me. Progress

Happy Birthday( Not)

Today has been a truly different day, it is he birthday of David ( the names have been changed to protect the not s innocent). For the first time in 14 years at 12:01am I didn't call or text, it feels pretty good. But Robert was at my house today washing clothes and getting my trash together in an attempt to stay in my life. Now I have prayed for guidance about this because we share a child and it is hard for me to say stay away, he is truly not a bad guy, he is just one that can't seem to keep a job, drinks too much and has no since of real responsibility, although in the past 3 years I have seen a slight change. But how much is to much? Are you here for the child, me or yourself? Clearing out the clutter in your life is essential in opening the door for right relations. I know that God is Not going to send my perfect partner in the mess of the mess. I am still working to be free.